Wednesday, August 19, 2009
What Online Dating ISN’T…
When people think of the term “online dating”… many imagine getting on a computer, browsing profiles, and exchanging emails with the opposite sex.
I want you to do me a favor, and wipe this image from your mind RIGHT NOW.
I want you to STOP thinking of online dating as sitting in front of a computer talking to men all day.
That is NOT what this is all about.
Online dating is simply a great tool for finding a great man… then meeting him in person and sharing a great relationship.
It is NOT about actually “dating online”… sitting on a computer for hours… “cyber sex” or making “pen pals”.
No way. What woman in her right mind wants to waste more time with a man they don’t even really know?
Online dating is simply a great way to meet someone who is right for you. And guess what else? You aren’t the only one who realizes this…
Why Thousands Of GREAT MEN Turn To Online Dating Sites… And How To Find Yours Among Them
Online dating used to have a bad reputation of being just a place where creeps and geeks went to get a date – male and female.
Fortunately that is not the case. Not by a long shot.
Nearly every guy I know who women would consider to be a GREAT CATCH has some sort of presence online… whether it be on a dating site or social network.
Especially “savvy” men who are good communicators and like to connect with the world and new people.
Here’s something to think about- I’m guessing that nearly all of the great men you know right now are TAKEN. They’re dating or married to someone you know.
And those great guys who aren’t in a serious relationship… guess what they’re doing?
Once upon a time, there was a woman who was very attracted to a particular man.
At first, he was just another attractive man...but the more she got to know him, the more she began to feel attracted to him... and the more time she spent with him, the more that attraction grew into a deep emotional attachment and affection for him.
But there was one problem. As her emotional attachment grew stronger and stronger, she also grew more and more insecure.
Because she couldn't tell whether or not he felt the same way towards her.
Sometimes he would talk to her and say things that led her to believe that they shared a special connection, but nothing ever progressed past the “friendship” stage.
There was an occasional glance, an occasional email or call from him... and a few times, he even opened up about something personal or emotional, and invited her “inside” for a little while.
But something was wrong with the picture.
He just wasn't acting like a man who was “falling in love”. He was acting like a friend, but at times, even more distant than a friend would be.
And things seemed to be hot and cold. Sometimes he would look at her and talk to her, and sometimes he would ignore her and close himself off.
The insecurity that she felt from all this, became a spiral that amplified itself... and the more insecure she became, the more afraid she grew of “screwing things up” or “scaring him off”, by starting conversations or asking him if he was interested in
her and why he didn't ask her out.
Plus, the more insecure she became, the less time he seemed to want to spend with her.
After spending days and nights obsessing over this guy, the woman finally arrived at the conclusion that if he only knew how SHE FELT, that he would feel the same way.
So she made a bold move.
She TOLD HIM how she felt.
She confessed her feelings and let him know that she wanted to be with him.
He responded by flirting with her and he spent some time alone with her, and they even kissed and held each other.
But soon after, he quickly withdrew, didn't call her and wasn't really “available” to her.
This only confused the woman more.
She didn't know how to take it...